Help - Search - Members - Calendar
Full Version: Glarkware
Bitter But Brilliant > T-Sucks, Jr. - the mini version of the parent > Diss And Dat

potmeetskettle
As requested .. the Glarkware thread.
a.j.
Thanks, PMK!

I'm mad at myself because last month's NoN had two Ralph Wiggum items, and I didn't get either. Damn poverty!
notime
It took me forever to figure out that bent wookie one. Sad, because I love Ralph. (Every time I see one of aj's posts I hear it being read in Ralph's voice.)
a.j.
Go banana!
thirdtime
Do they pride themselves on being as opaque as possible? It took me a while to realize the bent wookie thing as well.

Anyway, this shirt is kind of a cute pun - but that design is just so bad. I don't see how anyone could read it from a distance with the little gnome hats obscuring the text.

Uh, whuh?
NatalieX
Is the gnome shirt referencing The Amazing Race?
jedzz
I don't get it, but I'm going to stand over in the corner for the rest of the day, chuckling over the phrase "Sex Wax."
cupsie
New NoNs are up now-I know the Slap bet Commissioner is from How I Met Your Mother, but what is the Don't Mention the War thing from?

I have an odd fascination with Glarkware. I've actually bought a few of them, and I'll probably buy the Commissioner one, because I loved that episode, and I still have that damn song stuck in my head.

Editing-I googled it, and I guess it's from Fawlty Towers?
Joe Don Faker
Fawlty Towers - The Germans

Basil, suffering from the after-effects of a concussion, keeps rambling on about WWII in front of some German guests, who become frustrated with his tactlessness.

"Will you stop talking about the war?!"
"Me? You started it!"
"We did not start it!"
"Yes you did. You invaded Poland!"

The shirt design is based on the sign at the front of the hotel.
La G
Is Fawlty Towers some kind of cult programme in Canada and the US? It's 30 years old. Even here, where that scene is iconic and pretty universally known, that T-shirt would provoke some "they feel bad for Blair?" confusion.

I'm looking forward to the inevitable Flowerpot Men shirts.
Joe Don Faker
QUOTE ("La G note from (Prunella) Scales"+)
Is Fawlty Towers some kind of cult programme in Canada and the US? It's 30 years old.


Oh, yah know, Fawlty Towers is just generally highly regarded, so it enjoys 'classic' status and I suppose 'cult' status given that it originated outside of mainstream America. (For instance it's one of the very few shows cited as "never jumped" by the purveyors of the Jump the Shark site.)

I have a photo of myself staring sidelong with Fawltyesque disgust at Manuel the waiter as he fumbles with a plate of dishes. It was taken at Madame Tussaud's in London.
ActonBell
I kind of regret not buying the Vote for Petrelli tshirt now. I guess I only want things once I can't have them!
siebal
I don't get the "With Club Sauce" button set. Anyone?
ActonBell
It's from an episode of Arrested Development. In one episode, Gob kept adding "...with club sauce!" to the end of every sentence in an attempt to sound sexy to Lucille Ostero.
siebal
Ah. Thanks, ActonBell.
whome
Dammit, I may have to get Don't Mention the War.
La G
QUOTE (Joe Don Faker+Dec 8 2006, 04:46 PM)
I have a photo of myself staring sidelong with Fawltyesque disgust at Manuel the waiter as he fumbles with a plate of dishes. It was taken at Madame Tussaud's in London.
All you need is a Beefeater Bear (remember, they don't live in caravans) and you have seen all our culture has to give.
dottstar
I'm so tired of seeing that shirt that says "Zoombies, eat flesh" that supposed to be a take off of the Subway eat fresh commercial. Everybody knows Zoombies eat brains not FLESH!!! If anyone buys that shirt they're gonna be laughed at for not realizing the errors of their ways. Anyway, I'm just tired of seeing it.
roseland
Well, to be fair to Glark, it depends upon whose version of the mythical zombies you're dealing with. Certainly, George Romero's zombies ate flesh. As did the zombies in Evil Dead. And, in both movies, if they got of a chunk of your flesh and didn't kill you, you became a zombie, too.
jcpdiesel21
Plus, "zombies, eat brains" doesn't roll off the tongue quite as well as "zombies, eat flesh" does.

I think there's far worse stuff than the Zombie shirt on the Glarkware site. I think it's one of the better items on there.
ActonBell
QUOTE
Certainly, George Romero's zombies ate flesh. As did the zombies in Evil Dead. And, in both movies, if they got of a chunk of your flesh and didn't kill you, you became a zombie, too.
<br>Yeah, that was also the case in Shaun of the Dead -- I love that movie.
Eris Rising
In addition, "brains" doesn't play off of the "eat fresh" slogan so well.
dottstar
Sorry I don't remember the movies that well but I swear the zoombies in one were groaning "braaaaaiiionnnnns." This and this site has influenced my thinking too much I guess. I don't HATE the shirt, I'm just tired of seeing it advertised so prominently on the site. Change the rotation of tee shirt pimpage, Glark.
StickyKeys
Zoombies is just how you say it in Canada. Like aboot instead of about, and Canook instead of Red Headed Stepchild.
skittlebrau
QUOTE
If anyone buys that shirt they're gonna be laughed at for not realizing the errors of their ways.
<br>I have never been laughed at, and I love my Zombie shirt. The one thing that bugs me about it is that it says "ZOMBIE", not "ZOMBIES," which would be funnier. At least to me. But "Subway" only has six letters, so I see why the pluralization was left off.

Anyway, my husband used to go around singing "Subway, EAT FLESH!" and when I saw the shirt I had to get it. So it's more of an in-joke than a Zombie thing. For me, anyway. Even though I heart Evil Dead 2 and Shaun of the Dead.
dottstar
I'm more embarrassed now as I realized while putting away the Christmas DVDs I own Shaun of the Dead, and I've watched it enough I should realize they (the zoombies aka zombies) didn't particularly eat brains in that one. I've an itch to go rent all the old Zombie flicks to catch the one where I kept hearing the brains refrain. So I guess my idea of wearing a helmet to protect my brains really won't help in case of zombie invasion eh?
MickiRae
Zombies, Eat Flesh is one of the only Glarkware shirts I've considered buying lately. It's funny and also totally gettable.

The rest are so...completely impossible to figure out unless you watch the show and/or read the forum that I don't want to buy them. Because I really don't like having to explain my shirts when I wear them out in public. (A lesson I learned after buying the "Teacher, Mother, Secret Lover" shirt a few years ago.)
skittlebrau
The Zombies one actually gets more strange looks from people then my "SWEDGIN!" shirt. Maybe because it's bright green, and the SWEDGIN! one is a subdued and subtle tan. (The SWEDGIN! shirt is also like a litmus test. If you watch Deadwood at all, you get the shirt. If you don't, you won't. And I heart people who heart Deadwood, so there you go.)

I think those are actually the only two Glarkware shirts that I was like "OMG, MUST PURCHASE!!1!!" The rest don't make a damn bit of sense to me.
RockPaperScissors
Soo...what's the coat rack shirt about?
roseland
That's got to be a Dr. Who reference. The items on that coat rack seem to refer to the Dr. Who played by Tom Baker, who wore that hat and scarf (which was about 20-feet long).
zan
And who also used to use a coat rack in the TARDIS. The language about landing in an alien world supports that. I could kind of go for that shirt, since I was such a geeky Who fan back in the day.
ActonBell
As if it wasn't completely obvious, I am a very geeky Doctor Who fan so I definitely will be ordering this.
Isca
I'm also kind of craving the hoodie...

I think the T-shirt would be cuter if the image was smaller, or maybe on the back.
Joe Don Faker
QUOTE
Soo...what's the coat rack shirt about?


Is it designed to elicit comments about the niceness of one's rack?
pinruT
It looks like a saxaphone or other musical instrument on first glance to me. If I stared at it long enough on that model to figure out what it was it would likely earn me a smack from my better half.
StickyKeys
Yeah, there's a shirt on there and it's nothing but Tara's boobs in my face everytime I refresh the page. Thanks, but no thanks Tara.
dottstar
QUOTE (pinruT+Jan 9 2007, 10:33 AM)
It looks like a saxaphone or other musical instrument on first glance to me. If I stared at it long enough on that model to figure out what it was it would likely earn me a smack from my better half.
Thank God, I'm not the only one that saw the SAX! If anyone gets the shirt/hoodie let me know how long you get the chestal area stared at. Hey, good shirt to get a hubby or boyfriend jealous.
Rex Dart
QUOTE (StickyKeys+Jan 9 2007, 02:58 PM)
Yeah, there's a shirt on there and it's nothing but Tara's boobs in my face everytime I refresh the page. Thanks, but no thanks Tara.
I have Adblock... PLEASE DO NOT TELL ME THAT WING IS MODELING SHIRTS.
a.j.
I don't think it's her, but if it is, then good on her. Those boobies look great.
xii
What's weird is, I'm so used to bitterly ignoring web ads featuring obscenely enhanced women's bodies that the picture of a normal woman's nice rack is somehow more distracting.
roseland
I thought it was Tara's younger sister who modeled the t-shirts. I seem to remember Glark mentioning it one day in the thread that deals with that stuff.
a.j.
That's what I've always thought, too. And I think the male model is her husband.
Little Bender
No I think the male model is Glark. He has some pretty distinctive (and ass-kicking) tattoos.
NikkiJ
QUOTE (Isca+Jan 9 2007, 03:22 PM)
I'm also kind of craving the hoodie...
Me too, and I'm weaning myself off TWoP and it associates. I think my credit card will be getting used soon.
StickyKeys
I know some are definitely Glark, but the other one may be the Toque or whatever that chick's name is. I think it was the hair and the admittedly impressive yet wholly distracting boobage that messed me up.

PANTS! ON BOOBS!
Isca
Can I thank this poster?

QUOTE
KyleJN
Just Tuned In


Feb 6, 2007 @ 9:30 am
Email ˇ Report ˇ Post #1776
I thought these shirts were supposed to be exclusive "Now or NEVER"--why is the Frakkin' Toaster shirt once again available--especially after just a few months?!
<br>Seriously, what the hell? New shirts only, please. There seem to have been a LOT of reprints lately. That and lame-ass buttons. Why don't they make clever shirts anymore? Now it's just wacky huge graphics and zany colours.
IRule
Yeah really. Plus, if they are going to do a reprint - why not reprint "This is how we do it in the TWoP, Bitch" in honor of The O.C.'s end. I must say the Shirt Five post is tempting (yeah, I'll admit it - I totally bought the Dr. Acula shirt).
Gizmonicon
I have the Broken Ox and Narm shirts. They are kinda thin, but I like 'em. I'm bummed I missed out on the THIRTEEN! shirt, though. Glark should reprint that in honor of "Rome"'s last season.
IRule
Yeah I have Dr. Acula, Criznappy (NewsRadio reference) and "I'm Too Punk Rock for This" - they aren't say, Threadless quality - but they aren't bad. They should repring the THIRTEEN! shirt.
a.j.
I have Too Punk Rock, Boo-urns, and You're Nothing Without Your Robot Car, which was a FT NoN and I think they made it a regular item. Oh, I also have Kappa Kappa Wong and a few of the regular Glarkware shirts. Damn, I have more of their stuff than I thought.
ActonBell
I have the Bad Wolf t-shirt and the Frakkin' Toaster t-shirt. I'm such a Sci-Fi geek.

Seriously though, glarkware should just make the Frakkin' Toaster shirt a regular item and not a NoN because this is the third time they've printed it. What's the purpose in having a now or never item if you keep reprinting every few months?
StickyKeys
I have none because I'm the dastardly combination of cheap and poor, but I covet the Todd Five shirt, the Soviet Russia one, and The Dr. Acula.

In Ask Tubey there's a request thread going now.
Isca
I have the CSI bingo shirt and the Chung Chung shirt.

I wanted Makeover, and Scranton Party, but they were both so ugly I never would have worn them.
notime
I have the Dingo Snack one for my daughter.
daisymaize
I like the Todd shirt a lot, but I wouldn't wear it. I've bought a couple of Glarkware shirts on impulse (the "House" shirt and the JR shirt), but the only one I've bought that I actually wear is the Veronica/Backup shirt. I just like it. It's simple.

I like the *idea* of a lot of the shirts, but the designs just don't work for me.
Rockstar
I have the frakkin' toaster shirt. I really want a Thirteen shirt so I'm hoping they bring that one back.
whome
I have Backup, and I was thrilled to get it in a reprint. I've liked some others but thought they were a little ugly and that I wouldn't actually wear them. Plus they're expensive. I like the Todd shirt but don't really want a handprint on my chest.

What are the boosh buttons about?
jcpdiesel21
I think the Shirt Five design would be better if it said Shirt Five for The Todd. He always refers to himself by putting "the" before his name.

What's the significance of Twelve? Is it a riff on Sesame Street or something?
whome
You're right, "The Todd" is how it should be. Hm, makes the shirt less desirable. I wonder if there could have possibly been a reason why they couldn't use "The Todd."

The funky pinball counting song from Sesame Street.

And a Wikipedia entry. They have everything! I didn't know it was by the Pointer Sisters.
IRule
Yeah, it's on the Classic Sesame Street DVD that I got back in October. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12...doo doo doo doo, etc. Great montage. Not as fond of the shirt, but I love the idea.
skittlebrau
Confession time: I bought the C:\>HLOE shirt because I thought it was a Smallville shirt. It wasn't until I started watching 24 again this season (haven't watched it since season one) that I realized I'm wearing around a 24 shirt.

(They should make it clear on their product descriptions, dammit! Stupid people like me are obviously easily confused.)
Seven
QUOTE (whome+Feb 8 2007, 03:49 PM)
What are the boosh buttons about?

They're quotes from the Cartoon Network/Adult Swim show Frisky Dingo. Glark and Wing are big fans; they've been changing the thread's subtitle (in the Cartoons & Kids area) to various quotes every so often. The show is worth checking out; it's hilarious.
whome
Thanks. I googled around and got the idea that it might be from a British show that didn't seem to have made its way to North America, and I didn't think that was it. Sadly, I can't afford the cable plan that would give me the Cartoon Network right now. And even if I could, I'm not sure I'd go for it because I know from experience that that many channels=me being a bigger couch potato than I already am. It looks like I can watch some scenes from this show on YouTube, so I'll do that sometime.
Canard
You guys have probably all already seen this, but if there are Glarkware NoN designs you DON'T hate (I agree, lots are ugly or needlessly cryptic), they're selling off all the leftovers. I just got Boo-urns and Crizappy (I have coveted both of those for so long) and have been leaping about for joy.
whome
I went there yesterday and the shop was down. It still is. (This is the leftovers shop I'm talking about, not the regular glarkware shop.)
Seven
I noticed it was down this morning. I wonder if it was ever up at all today? I got lucky yesterday and was able to order a Sydney's Wig Outlet shirt.
IRule
My Crizappy shirt got stained - so I hope one is still left when the shop re-opens. That's actually pretty cool (meaning the leftovers sale).
thundarr
Well, this is different. From Glark:
QUOTE
The TWoP store on Glarkware will soon be officially shut down.
And the store thread is now locked.
Gladly
I did wonder what would happen to the store. I think an independent website can get away with selling gear that makes oblique references to shows but NBC-Universal can't.
Watermelon Rose
Yeah, the now-or-never clear-out did seem like a preparation for that.
thundarr
The final sale seems like a thank you gift to the fans. If I remember correctly, it was planned a few months in advance, which signals how long they've been talking with Bravo. Also, wasn't it making some money for TWoP to pay the bills?
grrrrl75
Well, that just really sucks! Man, I wish I'd gotten more of these cool messenger bags while I could!
whome
Not a surprise. There were some things I would have liked from the last sale had they been available in my size. Oh well. I've got Backup.
cupsie
It does say "Please stay tuned for more NoN-style offering from Glarkware soon." on the TWOP page on Glarkware-it'll be interesting to see what actually happens with that.
nik
Was the "Makeover" shirt a reference to Clone High? I honestly didn't know what a lot of the slogans were supposed to be referencing.
Isca
Daaamn.. Glarkware has had some ugly shirts, but that Hammock district thing? Hideous.
jcpdiesel21
Aw, I think the Cadet Mars shirt is kind of cool, mainly because it would be fun to have a shirt with "FBI" in huge letters on the back.
whome
The Dr. Acula shirt's "puncture wounds" are, in my opinion, in an unfortunate place on the girlie T.
jcpdiesel21
QUOTE (whome+Jul 10 2007, 02:03 AM)
The Dr. Acula shirt's "puncture wounds" are, in my opinion, in an unfortunate place on the girlie T.
Heh, I noticed that as well.

I might just have to get the Sparkles Mall Tour shirt.
skittlebrau
Hee. I love this one. Is it new? I notice you can still order Metallicar and Frakkin' Toaster. Are some things able to get by the Bravo bosses and others aren't?
grrrrl75
I don't know what "Tis a Good Shirt English" means. What am I missing?

Also, I think Glarkware is completely independent of Bravo/TWoP now -- except that they purchase ads from them, maybe? Otherwise, I don't know how they let those go.
Valonia
It's a Simpsons reference.

And yeah, I don't see any Bravo mentions on the site, but I'd bet they have to be careful about infringing on any NBC-owned properties.
TheRealWW1979
I like the "Good Day Sir" shirt, but it's annoying that they give this long explanation on how it was used in Victorian times, when it was clearly taken from "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory". Way to CYA, guys.
Rockstar
I know I'm a giant dork, but I love the Hyperbole t-shirt. I might have to buy one.
Spike
I broke down and ordered the Constant Source of Disappointment shirt for myself. For some reason, I just loved it.
dottstar
QUOTE (Spike+Nov 13 2007, 06:05 PM)
I broke down and ordered the Constant Source of Disappointment shirt for myself. For some reason, I just loved it.
I think Christina on The Amazing Race owns that shirt too.
Magpie
Maybe Glark should produce some "Free Christina" buttons, like the "Free Ron" ones he did a few seasons ago.
skittlebrau
Want.

Do not want.

I was all excited to see the latter promoted on the former's product page, till I found out it was buttons and not a t-shirt.

I love that they try very hard to make no reference to The Wire in the product description. It doesn't even mention Baltimore. Or "drugs."
Dame Philippa
QUOTE
Attention DHAK Members: We're Cleaning House!

We noticed two DHAK member site domains have been gobbled up by domain pirates (booo) and we haven't seen posts from some of you sexy people in a while. So we're going to do a little house cleaning. If you're on the list to the side and wish to stay on DHAK and continue posting please email me by the February 20th.
<br>. . . no . . . come back! Shane!

Yeah, it's not Glarkware, but did we really need a whole thread for DHAK?
To quit out of "lo-fi" mode and return to the regular forums, please click here.
dizayn.de © 2003 - 2009 - "lo-fi" for InvisionPower Board v1.3